Storytelling – Space for Nature

Day Dreaming

Published on March 26, 2020April 3, 2020 by Space for Nature

I am sat in my garden admiring the stillness and the warm glow of the rising sun as it peers over my fence and illuminates the lemon balm.

The sky is azure blue and cloudless and I sit in my hammock as the East is ablaze with a full round sun , blinding to gaze upon.

I am sitting with polarities. The polarity between grace and rage in these turbulent times . I am aware that I am aching to connect.

What I miss is connection. Connection with depth. The rich soul depth of true contact with another being.

I swim in rich internal pools of wonder and longing , naive and guileless, full of childlike wonder and innocence. I marvel at newly spun webs on the ash , the filaments of rainbow light that appear through cracks as I squint my eyes.

I am flighty and skittish – easily spooked. A foal finding her legs. I am often clumsy in the way I take to this body and its place on the earth. I often stumble about until something clicks and I can prance and throw my head as I skip and frolick , jerkily moving more life into my body and my limbs .Free yet contained and constrained by the physical limitations, a part of me confused as to why I can only expand to fill up so much space.

I can not be everywhere as I wish to be. I cannot fully touch the all that is . I can only anchor in a small part of this universe and it feels a little … uncomfortable …uncertain.

I am not sure if I like it or care for it much . It is alien to a part of me that has been to the sun and knows the cosmos as a brother. I feel estranged and forgotten and abandoned down here – where are they ?

They have left me with friends they say;

“With the trees and with mountain, with forrest and with hill

They will look after you.

With flowers and river and ocean, they will comfort you

With wind and with rain and with fire, they will welcome you, nourish you, revive you” they say , but still i am lost and my heart aches for the stars that are my home.

In the stillness of morning before the raucus caw of gul and crow and the quiet song of the morning birds, I hear the static of the atmoshpere warming as the Sun ascends on the horizon. I hear the fizz of atoms heating up. I feel the energetic shift from cool still night to dawning day .

I hear it crackle imperceptibly all around me . It’s this invisible sound that stirs and wakes my sleeping body each new day. Its magnetic pull that lulls me from the dream of sleep to the lucidity of wakefullness.

It leaves a heaviness , a sadness , of a soul returned to its box . I try not to let this realisation dampen my day but it feels like dead weight i can not bear to carry.

I look up and remember the sun , lazily surfacing over the rooftops and feel it lighten my being . I feel the joy and energy of life in my heart. Excitement and possibilities come to my window and invite me to play.

And I sit between the ache of longing for what cannot be and the joy of what can be created.

I sit between the darkness and the dawn wishing to be lifted back into the sun

Back into the earth

Back into the world

Back into life

And i carry with me both joy and sorrow

Belonging and loss

Fire and water

Strength and tenderness

Fear and courage

Hope and hopelessness

Grace and rage

And i take each day as it comes.

Touching into painful places ;I nourish them with warmth and light, courage and conviction, acceptance of what is.

I breathe.

Inhaling possibility, exhaling all that is done and gone.

One day at a time.

One step at a time.

One breath at a time.

Beginning at the end

Published on November 6, 2019November 6, 2019 by Space for Nature

Sometimes in the process of change we hit the floor.

That’s not a euphemism, I mean sometimes we actually end up lying in a shaking , quivering heap on the floor unable to stop crying, unable to catch our breath , all alone and wondering how the fuck we get back up again .

How many more times do we have to fall to bits? How long till the next wave hits and wrecks our ship?

In recent times , I expect many have had this happen in seemingly endless waves , as more and more is being confronted . As more and more is being addressed personally and collectively.

We thought we’d seen the end of it – but one last bastard thing tried to kill us ,we thought we had had enough of this shit already , but apparently not .

Life had other plans for us .

And before the stuff we knew we needed could be let in – everything that we knew we didn’t need had to go .

Whether we liked it or not we either jumped in or we were pushed to face what we had been putting off.

Letting go.

What kept us so scared and frightened of doing it? what kept us clinging in fear? Our own fear of change .

But let go we did and….

Once we made it to the other side we saw it was actually not the awful, terrible thing we thought it was going to be.

What did we wait so long for ? Why did we struggle so much ? Why did we keep resisting what we knew needed to happen?

We waited because we needed to feel aligned with-in with what we were bringing out. We needed time to check in, make sure, double check , cover old ground , weed out the last bits and properly clear the ground.

We needed to grieve our losses and take comfort in our gains and in what remains.

Its been tough for lots of us one way or another.

Turns out this year has been a massive clear out of old baggage for the last time . A clean sweep. The loss of all that we really do not need anymore . Friendships , jobs , relationships . If it wasn’t helping it was hindering and won’t be coming back.

Big Karma has been clearing if you like. Its been a chance to say ‘nope, not doing that anymore , I want something different” and the cosmic back drop has been assisting us collectively to do this.

Dare we dream a new life into being collectively? Dare we rewrite the narrative , tear up the old and try something radically different ?

Dare we create a future where we survive and thrive in a more co-operative and mutually respectful society ?

Something better is coming our way – something new. Something needed. Something necessary for our future survival . Something new for Earth.

It is possible – the end of the old is coming – there will be a shift – a paradigm shift – it will take place . It is already happening.

What comes after that though is up to us – its dependant on the foundations we choose to lay . Do we take the opportunity to learn from the past and do it differently this time ?

I believe we will. We will sow the seeds in the ashes of whats left and something new will come . A new time of redressing the balance.

As the old celtic year threshold has been crossed and we walk through the veil between the old and the new year to come – we are in a place of either letting go and dying to the old or in a process of transforming and potentising whatever it is we wish to bring forth.

Can you feel it ?

Potent is definitely the energy of this time of year for me. Its a cauldron of energies mingling , mixing under the heat of the fire – distilling , condensing , brewing , alchemising .

I can feel the power of it as it bubbles away – waiting. Waiting for the perfect moment for it to be done. For the elixir to be ready to bring forth new beginnings, new life , new projects , new ventures.

Its been brewing for aeons. We have had to be patient. To wait. To stir and sit and test and taste the potion we have been concocting.

Tapping into a primordial , timeless space of creation – we begin at what appears to be the end . In a void . In darkness.

In the deep womb like cauldron of potential the sparks of atoms combining into form , take shape.

What are you alchemising? Transforming? Watching and waiting patiently to bring into being ?

What will you choose to create in the New Year to come ? what spark of light will you bring forth from the darkness to light up the world at the time of Winter Solstice – to carry through the next cycle of the seasonal year?

Its a time of deep resting , going within , travelling inward to receive and retrieve your dreams and visions.

Enjoy some stillness, slow down a little and allow yourself the opportunity to just be .

Enjoy the dark. Enjoy the quiet. Enjoy the pause. Enjoy the deep exhale as life breathes out and lets go before the next breath in.

In the darkness , life is dreaming with you.

Dream big. Bring forth a dream worthy of your power. Worthy of your best efforts. Worthy of the transformational shifts from what was to what will be.

For the benefit of all.

A new story for the earth is waiting to be dreamed into being . What thread will you bring to this Great Reweaving ?

What will you choose to be ? To do? To become ?

Take your time. Go gently.

Take care x

Alexa 💗

Wildness

Published on January 2, 2019February 23, 2019 by Space for Nature

They asked me how I knew , if no one taught me ?

Simple , I said.

I listened

to the whispers of the wind.

I watched

the flight of birds.

I observed

the patterns of the weather

And the seasons.

I followed the rivers flow.

I noticed how the animals moved.

I paid attention to the trees.

I felt the changes

in the air

and the earth

Beneath my feet.

I remembered my dreams

And took notice of my visions .

I spoke to the landscape, to the old ones of the forests and wild spaces.

I heard the world

speaking to me

in a thousand different voices

and

I listened.